A friend today told me that she loved my stuff (which was weird but nice) and that her favourite picture of mine was Cruelty Continues. [link] She said she loved the way it was done, and that by looking at it, it made her cry. Now, *I* would never have called this girl fat in my LIFE, she's stunningly beautiful and energetic and full of life...but I could see it in her eyes that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE in her life, had. Times like these that I hate most people for their lack of sensitivity. Big girls have feelings too.
I wanted to tell her that she IS spectacularly lovely, but she never would believe it. Because we never hear the true positives, we are so set on listening to the bad only. It's how we're programmed.
But made me feel so good to see I've touched someone. Even though I draw stupid cartoony styles, and even though most of the time I'm just trying to make someone laugh--comments like that just make me feel good. Because I WANT to affect people. In the case of chubby girls, if I can change the opinion of just one person out there who hates us....I've done a good thing. Because you know what? Chubby girls are always going to be there, we're never going to go away. And if the world was populated by Carmen Electras, and Britney Spears', and Kate Moss', we'd be pretty boring wouldn't we. (Not to mention high on super drugs and mental out of our minds.)
Both Cruelty [link] and the sequel are illustrations of my life, and the way I FEEL I've been viewed by others. So I am grossly overweight. You think I don't know? You think I don't see the looks I'm given in public, the way people eye me up and down before shaking my hand in an interview, or that nobody sits next to me on the bus? I'm fat, not stupid. I have dieted, I eat well. I am who I am.
So B, if you read this, know there is no bigger compliment to me than what you said to me tonight. I hope I helped you, even if it was only in a small way.


Peace out.

EDIT: The To Do List
A) Tattoo for Brad!
B) Painting for Harmonie
C) Painting for Mike
D) Gift for Wedding **DONE
E) Zombie profiles for Sibling, Kiel, Mairi, Boyfriend, Gerry
F) Guess the Anime IV and V
G) Art Blastside
H) Cruelty III